Corrupt A Wish

[1upmushroom]

Here's a classic forum game that I decided to start because I feel like having fun.

Here's how it goes, someone wishes for something like say I wish for a hundred dollars.

And then someone else grants that wish but also uses the "Genie Principal" by corrupting it with hilarious/dramatic results.

Ex.

"I wish I had an X-box."

"Granted but it's broken."

or

"I wish had the director's cut of "The Magnificent Ambersons."

"Granted, and then you wake up."

Last but not least:

"I wish I had a cake!!!"

"Granted, it's a fruitcake."

The goal is to be as creatively cruel as possible.

Now let me start:

I wish had an arcade system!

[SethRex]

Granted. But it's made up of games you've played and hated.


I wish for one date with Jessica Alba.

[Redstar]

Granted, but it's not the Jessica Alba.

I wish for the return of Twinkies.

[1upmushroom]

Granted but it's Mrs. Debs twinkie clones just with the twinkie name on it.

I wish shadowgate had a true sequel.

[SethRex]

Granted. But they've taken everything you love about Shadowgate and thrown it out the window.

I wish I had a Blu-Ray edition of Super Mario Bros.

[1upmushroom]

Granted, but it's just a blue-ray version of a Walkthrough of the first Super Mario Brothers game.

I wish I was in the Mushroom Kingdom.

[Star Ma'am]

Granted, but because of your wealthy status your parents also opt to arrange your marriage!

I wish Byron 'Evil Ryu' Mann was born on any date BUT January 27 1967! (if you've played the Street Fighter games, you can see why Byron's date of birth is a problem especially for the Vega fans...)

[SethRex]

Granted, but due to the fact that you weren't specific, he's born literally 5 seconds after midnight going into the very next day.

I wish I had a dollar for every time someone bought a Super Mario Bros. game.

[Star Ma'am]

Granted - but you end up with $20 billion, and Bison demands it as a ransom for the 63 hostages

I wish I had some form of memento of my late cat Blinky (who sadly had to be put to sleep in April )...

[1upmushroom]

Granted, it's a picture of your cat, but it's heavily burnt up since someone threw it in a fire.

I wish I had an arwing.

[Star Ma'am]

Granted - but Slippy Toad is in it with you, and the good ship Righteous Indignation is flying behind you so... need I say more?

I wish Street Fighter X Tekken was more Vega-friendly. Vega and Balrog's ending SUCKS!

[1upmushroom]

Graned, but he got bailed out anyway, so it doesn't matter.

I wish I knew the answer to life the universe and everything.

[Star Ma'am]

Granted, but as always the answer is "42!"

I wish Balrog (the boxer) was killed off! I HATE Balrog!

[1upmushroom]

Granted but then the fans of Balrog find out you killed him and are now coming to kill you.

I wish Action 52 was good.

[Star Ma'am]

Granted but then the fans of Balrog find out you killed him and are now coming to kill you.

I wish Action 52 was good.

(The Balrog fans will stand no chance against the Vega fan sect I'm in!)

Granted, but the sequel is bad and ugly (The Good, The Bad & The Ugly, get it? )

I wish the law would clamp down on abusive teachers (like this really horrible Devo Chamber-worthy highschool teacher I had) - if the law insists on education, then they should insist on the experience being comfortable!

[Prime Evil]

I wish for the return of Twinkies.

Granted, but you get Legolas, Link (Legend of Zelda), and the band Wellington showing up at your door.

Oh, is that my coat? Why thank you...

[1upmushroom]

Your wish is granted and since you didn't wish for anyone I'm going to make up a wish...hmm let's see ah-ha!

"I wish I was Uwe Boll!"

Granted, and now people are coming out of the woodworks to kill you for your crappy movies.

[Prime Evil]

"I wish I was Uwe Boll!"

Why, are you a masochist?

[1upmushroom]

You wish to know if I'm a masochist?

Granted, I'm not one.

Aren't you glad you wished for that?